Job Swill

What is Job Swill, you ask? It's a blog about jobs and on the job experiences - the good, the bad and the ugly. At Job Swill all of the content is submitted by you, the worker. If you're one to share, you think of this as free therapy, and other readers will act as your shrink.

Do you have a job that you just hate? Do you get away with murder at work? Have you ever had a boss or co-worker that you couldn't stand? Is your job the best job ever? Have you ever had to deal with the client from hell? Do you like sharing? Job Swill wants to hear about every last detail, and then share them with the world. This way you can enjoy the moral support and ranting of your fellow job lovers and haters.

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I used to be a receptionist in an office and then moved up to an assistant position. For a while, it seemed like we had a rotation of temps in the position after me, who either didn't want the job, or who just weren't the right fit.

Unfortunately for me, that meant that I was constantly being pulled back up to the front desk to train every new person that showed up, even though it was no longer a part of my job description.

Finally, I passed along the resume of a girl whom I had known in college. We weren't really friends--more acquaintances really and had simply lived in the same dorm at one point in time.

Needless to say, I trained her and determined that I would finally wash my hands of the whole reception situation. I was so happy that she would be the new go-to gal from here on out.

Common Characteristics:

Loud and opinionated: speaks up about anything and is forceful with opinion.

Figure pointing: trying to discredit anyone at any opportunity.

Multi Focused: Meaning, seems to be focused every where they shouldn't be, and hardly where they should be.

Bossy: Has a way to verbalize in a manner that speaks down to people and over people.

Energy Obsorbing: What ever the issue, and there are many, this person has to speak about it intensely and command everyone's attention to it. Keeping others from focusing on there work and using the energy on what every the intense emergency is. example: a policy about toilet paper and while you are listening, a policy about policies for about two hours.

Mistaker/Cover upper: Because this person spends so much energy and time on just about everything, this person makes a lot of mistakes, then tries to cover it up by blaming others in office or where ever.

Credit taker: Takes credit for suggested way to do or handle something, right in front, or behind your back. Doesn't matter. Really doesn't think twice about it.

Tripper: Trips off at any thing that the brain cannot handle at the moment.
Trips off loudly, verbally and physically. A mere mention of anything to redirect this persons behavior, or to gently guide it in another direction is bound to trip this person off out of know where. Oh, who am I kidding, it could be just about anything...REALLY!

I recently went back to work after being sick for 3 years. After 4 months, I am about to explode. There is this one girl there who is constantly yelling in my face if I do anything or order anything without her approval. She is not my boss but is boss's pet and jealous. She is from El Savador and just became a US citizen. She will be nice one minute and then screaming in my face the next. We have actual staff meetings so she can yell at me in front of everyone. She is hostile, irrate and out of control. She is constantly looking over my shoulder to find a mistake. I work for an orthodontist who is oblivious to the trauma this evil bitch has caused. Yesterday, she was in my face so close, I almost punched her. Please help me!

(Posted by Anonymous)

If you look up the word favoritism in the dictionary, you'll see a picture of my place of employment! It is by far the worst place I have ever seen as far as equal treatment goes. The so called administration hold some employees to a high standard while turning a blind eye to what others do (or fail to do). It's all about whether or not they like you. If they like you, you can do whatever you want when you want without any fear of consequences. However, if they don't like you, you had better watch your back and document everything that happens, because chances are, you may need it in court one day.

One classic example is my department. One guy made an honest mistake. They made him live in fear that he would be fired for this very honest and easily fixed mistake. Luckily, they couldn't fire him for it, so he had nothing to worry about, but it's just the principle of the thing! Yet, we have this one fat piece of waste who misses work constantly (has not worked a full week since February of this year), dresses inappropriately, talks trash about the powers that be (who LOVE HER!), is damn near impossible to get in touch with when she is actually at work, spreads hateful rumors about other employees being gay, and is just an all around low life. But, you can't get the so called bosses to sniff in her direction.

The story continues ...

(Posted by Anonymous)

Ok, so I'm working full-time for a State office while trying to get into something more in 'my field'....

There is no limit to the odd characters who sit around me....I'm surrounded by the Office Schizo, a very paranoid, very agitated middle aged woman who believes that ABSOLUTELY every conversation & email is about destroying her. Symptoms include: sneaking glances at me across the aisle w/narrowed eyes, all the while popping blackheads.

Then there's Allergy Guy whom I think has Tourettes'. He clears his throat 1000+ times per day, but if it's only throat clearing, we're lucky. Other times, it's snorting of mucus back into his little pea brain.

& most delightful of all, there's Creepy Pakistani Pervert Guy. He is in the cube next to me & takes to standing up & looking around (presumably to try & look down my shirt). Otherwise, he slurps his tea very loudly & apparently has a Doritos addiction as i hear him rummaging around in his file cabinet every 2 minutes to dig around for chips. After the chomping subsides, he gets back up again & hovers over his desk, playing w/papers. He's already been accused of trying to kiss a developmentally delayed girl that works as a file clerk in the elevator. He's balding & in his 50s & has hair like Animal from the Muppets. & he writes creepy poetry which he has gotten someone to publish into a book & tries to sell to all of the managers.

arggh, I work in a ZOO!

(Posted by Burnt Out Grad)

I work in a place one would think would have the highest of professionalism and ethics. This place is a disaster. After putting up with verbal abuse, hostility and insane mood swings from my co-worker, I went to the head honcho of the department. I told him about her berating issues, treating me like a four year old, her overbearing behavior and histrionic antics. Hoping to find solace and maybe a solution, he told me she is "old school", I am being too sensitive and get over it. I was dumbstruck. The other kick in the head is he told me she's my supervisor. Since when? Am I such a moron that I need two people over me???

This kind of behavior seems to be a trend among middle aged power hungry career secretaries. I don't know what her problem is. I wouldn't be shocked if it were revealed she's got an addiction issue. Her erratic behavior thoroughly defines that of an addict.

(Posted by Anonymous)

At my job, I was called The Ice Queen because I could keep a straight face and even voice no matter what. Actually, the reason I treated them that way was because they were disgusting and had very nasty ways. I was the paralegal. One lawyer would pick boogers all day and wipe them on the files. When going through files I would find these little monsters. ewwwww. I would go to his office to tell him about his nasty habit and tell him I absolutely refused to touch the file or the contents. He was clearly embarrassed but glared at me. Then his brother, who worked with him, intercommed me to come to his office to talk about a new case and the file I was supposed to write up. He sat there at his desk, frantically picking boogers, totally grossing me out. When he finished talking and simultaneously escavating his notstrils, he tried to hand me the file. omg .... nooooo thanks. I refused to take the file and told him why, of course, with a straight face and even voice. I walked back to my little office that had no windows and no air. I would still close my door and lock it. (From time to time, the lawyers would try the handle and finding it locked would proceed to bang or even kick the door, all the while yelling to be let in. Emergency client or case. Yeah, so.) I heard him slam the files to the floor from his office and when his brother and another lawyer went to see why he was making such a commotion, he roared that The Ice Queen strikes again, meaning I refused to touch the papers until he got a brand new, clean file and washed his hands before handing me the file. Thereby making his work late or else undone.

The story continues after the jump.

(Posted by Anonymous)

I used to answer the general information line at a large music venue. One day I get a call from a man asking if we have any concerts for children available. I check the schedule and say:

"There is the Salute to Bugs Bunny Concert with the Philharmonic." I then see that that concert was last week. "Oh, I'm sorry sir that concert has passed. It was last Saturday."

The man replied "So, it's not avaiable?"

"Not unless you have a time machine."

There was a long pause before finally- "What?"

"No, it's not available sir."

(Posted by Michael)