The Ice Queen

Dearest Ice Queen,

You are my co-worker on a technicality. My boss is your boyfriend and he works out of the house you share and wants you to feel involved in his "life". This does not mean you can whiz through the office in a freaking nightie and ask me a million questions. Especially not ones that go "Did you do that whatchamcalit for the thingie he needed to pick up yesterday?"

I know your saying I'm just full of hate and I secretly want your boyfriend but since you don't know me here is the low down and dirty. Your man and I see eye to eye. Yes, we agree on many things but that's not what I'm talking about. Homeslice and I are exactly the same height. That won't work. Momma likes em tall. Besides he's old. Like my dad old. Not cool...not cool at all.

So please dearest stick to decorating or whatever it is you supposedly do. Because I show up to do hardcore officing. Little girls like you could wind up with a papercut or a staple to the forehead if your not careful.

Love Always,

The One who stares at you blankly at least twice everday.